Life Changes in the Blink of an Eye

On December 19 2020 What I thought was going to just be a normal workday, turned into a complete nightmare. Long story short, when I broke my foot , it also damaged my nerves, ligaments, soft tissue, tendons ect. I am having excruciating pain above and beyond the normal for a broken foot. Pain that has never ended 24/7 since I injured my foot. On top of that, I've been bedridden since the injury. I have to have my foot elevated or it swells, turns purple and is even more severely painful. I also lost mobility in my ankle and cannot even move my toes. I am still unable to walk on it at all and its been 5 months since the injury. Turns out the nerve damage caused me to have a condition called RSD/CRPS.

Complex Regional Pain Syndrome is a non curable de-habilitating progressive disease, also known as the suicide disease. Dr's know little about this rare condition. There is not many things they can do to help and at this point they don't even know if or when I will ever walk again. Its pretty scary thinking I'll be bed bound or wheel chair bound the rest of my life or who knows when or if I will ever go into remission. Many people never reach remission and if they do it can come back at any moment and normally does. Crazy thing is it can also spread to other limbs or throughout your body and even internal organs. Its also known to bring on many other health conditions as it is a nervous system disorder. This disorder tops all the pain scales and never stops 24/7. Constantly sending pain signals to your brain. Its totally exhausting.

At this point I'm just letting you all know that all my work has obviously been on hold as I'm in too much pain to even function , bedridden, going to therapy, pain management doctors and trying to find a specialist who treats this rare condition in hopes that we will find a way to get me in remission. I pretty much feel like I've entered the twilight zone. When you get a diagnosis like this you go through denial, disbelief, anger, sadness. Losing your entire life is devastating. I can't do much of anything without help, in pain and sick from the medications. Pretty much grieving the loss of my life at this moment. Don't get me wrong, I'm still trying to stay as positive as possible. I'm holding out hope for remission and working hard in physical therapy to hopefully regain my mobility. So far I've been on crutches and a knee scooter for 5 months, which is extremely difficult to maneuver when your in this much pain. I swore I wouldn't do a wheelchair, but at this point Its most likely inevitable. I mostly have to stay in bed with my foot propped up to keep it from turning purple.

As you can see below (hesitated to even show you my horrid foot lol). the disease is already deforming my foot. It doesn't even look like it used to at all. The pain is indescribable. That photo was last month and it looks even worse now. That photo was only me being up for a couple of minutes. It gets worse if I'm up longer. That is why Ive been bed ridden since the injury. I've already started to develop tremors throughout my body, blurred vision, headaches, nausea and even more stress pains in my back, hips and shoulders (some of which are possibly caused by being on crutches for months). The pain and redness is already spreading up my shin and sometimes my knee. In addition to that, I was up all night in sever hip pain. Hoping that doesn't mean its already spreading that far. I'm just a hot mess!

So there's just a brief glimps at what's been happening. So bare with me as I go through this terrifying journey. Hopefully remission or relief will come sooner than later. I hope by sharing my journey it also brings more awareness to this horrible condition. Most doctors and nurses have never even heard of it. That alone is very scary. I wasn't going to share my story but everyone keeps asking where I've been or if I'm ok, so I wanted to let you all know.

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